Friday, July 22, 2011

I am a hunter-gatherer mother.

Way back in history,  in the Middle to Upper Paleolithic Era, men and women lived a largely egalitarian lifestyle as hunter-gatherers. In fact, it was more a man's duty to collect vegetables and firewood while women were charged with hunting small game for consumption. As people became less transient and began to settle into farming societies, the tides shifted, and women's status declined and they became more confined to the home as their "jobs" were given more to reproduction as a way to ensure that farming communities would have enough hands to contribute to cultivating the land.

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What does this have to do with my point? Well, at least in my lifetime, I've seen another shift in the relationships that women have within their families. Of course, the positions of power in this country are more relegated to males, but women have begun to retake many of those roles that once provided them with honor and respect back in hunter-gatherer days. In my house, I am a hunter-gatherer woman. It is true that Matt is the one who goes out and gets paid for the work that he does, but even more true is the fact that I am the one who is designated food gatherer/hunter. I do the bills to keep the fire going. I produce and look after the children. My main goal of each day is to protect (and serve) my family. And I hunt for all the crap that everyone in the house loses on a consistent basis.
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Usually, I'm one hell of a hunter-gatherer for the missing items. Usually. I can tell Matt where his belts are... on the hook in the closet (where they belong and for the 1 billionth time). I know where the underwear is... in your drawers, people... and the extra paper towels are. I can locate the source of "funny" (and not funny haha) smells around the house. Little buttons, pieces of puzzles, specific pencils, tiny Barbie shoes, computer cords, games, dragons, Mercy Lou, missing socks, remote controls, and DSis.
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Wait, what? Remote controls and DSis? This is where the 'usually' comes in. Right before we went to Florida a couple of weeks ago, the remote control for the television in the living room went missing... right around the same time that Summit's DSi disappeared. Now, being the huntress (and DVRed reality TV junkie) that I am, it is a rare occasion when I am unable to smoke out a remote control. Rare. But this thing had simply vanished into thin air. Same with the DSi. Not that I actually play with the thing, but we needed it for our drive to Orlando. (Some may be wondering why it was that we didn't fly... Ella... but our trip was super-last minute.. and the drive isn't so bad.) We needed it so that S and E wouldn't be fighting over the girl's DSi. We needed it for sanity and to keep the boy busy. Alas, it was nowhere to be found. Without a trace, it was gone.

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A couple of days ago, we discovered the truth. After interrogating the kids for hours, we learned what had become of our technological friends. Summit, as a lover of non-sticky, non-dirty stuff, had taken it upon himself to "clean" both the remote and his DSi. Clean them, not with a paper towel or by blowing off the dirt, but clean them with soap and water. In the sink. Full of water. Because the things had been missing for so long, I'd given up on my desire to hunt for them, deciding instead to just gather more from the store, so I didn't want to wring his little neck when the truth came out. And, I couldn't be mad... he was trying to do something good. It wasn't his intention to destroy the things. We'd never told him that it was a bad idea. But, dear Jesus, I've always thought he had more sense than that. One thing I was grateful for in the whole debacle was that my abilities hadn't let me down. I could have found them if he hadn't thrown them away after he realized his mistake. I am still a hunter-gatherer woman.


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