Seven very short years ago, life as I knew it exploded and changed - changed and grew - in love and meaning and depth and perspective.
It had been 10 months in the making. And she was right on time - completely unlike the often late, butterfly chasing, ladybug twirling lolly gagger that she is today. Ushered in by a billion barrells of crashing thunder and an entire Grateful Dead light show worth of lightning, her entrance was nothing short of grand and memorable. So, it's not surprising that each of the years since then have been increasingly intricate, absolutely dramatic, and completely unforgettable because of her place in our family. She is our little Big Bang Theory.
From the moment that we learn we will become someone's mother or father, parents' lives become consumed with teaching children how to eat, sleep, soothe. Immediately, we are charged with creating an environment that is nurturing, stimulating, peaceful, and safe - a world in which we can raise these tiny beings to be the best, healthiest, happiest individuals possible. We make sure the nursery wall paint is of a color that illicits proper energy development, the children's books are appropriately thoughtful directions for leading wholesome lives, the baby soap doesn't contain toxic ingredients... along with a multitude of other musts and mustn'ts to make sure we don't completely ruin our babies.
And so it was with my Ella. Her room was painted a lovely green, sprinkled with butterflies, that would promote peace and growth. We bought her books like
Zen Shorts to teach her to treat others with compassion. Her baby shampoo was organic and paraben free (so is her big kid shampoo, and that stuff isn't cheap... it better work). I could go on and on, but I'm sure you get the picture and there's no need to go running you off.
The ironic thing about all the effort put into being parents is that we (blindly) think that we're the ones doing all of the raising... but all along, it's been she who has been teaching us the big lessons about life, love, responsibility, beauty, compassion, selflessness, and patience. We give her the support for the basic needs, and, in return, she gives us herself. She put her life, her love, her heart... pure and simple... in our hands. Full of trust and willingness and acceptance. No strings attached.
And it was an explosion. A tiny being exploded on the scene of our lives and changed everything. It was unfathomable to me before she was here how I could fall head over heels in unconditional love. Before she was here, I loved in a different era - in a different world. Then along came my girl, and she created an entirely different universe of emotions and beauty and perspective all unbeknownst to me.
These past seven years have blown past me faster than I ever imagined. And the more I grow to appreciate life and the world with my sweet baby girl, the more time speeds up. What's going on there? (Thanks a lot, universe.) She's gone from being my Baby Butterbean whose fully-stretched arms barely reached her ears to an inquisitive toddler with blond shoots of pigtails atop her head to a rambunctious pre-schooler daring to try her hand at independence to a 7-year-old little girl who reads and writes and draws and swims, who thinks for herself.
She is my precious angel and I am in total awe of her. I love her with a love that completely knocked me off my feet and taught me so much about myself and the world. For that, Ella, I thank you. Happy 7th Birthday, my love.
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